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seriousficMichael "Magneto" Fassbender is in this movie. He plays one of those Irish Confederate soldiers. As you do.
ETA: Just because Jonah Hex fought for the Confederacy doesn't mean he's a racist. He has a black friend! Yes, there's an entire scene dedicated just to that.
ETA2: WB logic: Wonder Woman movie directed by Joss Whedon--bad idea. Jonah Hex movie from the director of Horton Hears A Who, with Josh Brolin and Megan Fox as the star couple--good idea.
ETA3: There's a scene where Magneto shoots Hex with a double-barrel shotgun--which doesn't kill him, so I guess Hex is effectively immortal in this--again, in a movie where the big threat is our hero being shot, why is he able to shrug off being shot? That takes all the tension out of the shoot-outs. Anyway, Hex gets shot, Magneto taunts him... lets him get to his feet and take a shot... then turns his back on Hex and farts around for a while before acting surprised that Hex manages to get away. And despite Hex being mortally wounded and there being a whole army behind him, no one thinks to go after him. I mean, geez, even the old Lone Ranger serials would be ashamed of that one.
ETA4: Dear Megan Fox hooker, based on my knowledge of the "fancies fellows" demographic, if Michael Fassbender walks into your room, the response is not "I'm done for the night." The response is "Half off!" and you're referring to clothes.
ETA5: I know John Malkovich is a good actor, but if he's your heavy, maybe don't put him in a fistfight with Josh Brolin? Since Malkovich is a geriatric? I mean, c'mon.
ETA6: By the way, Malkovich's character is a Confederate terrorist (yes, they call him that) who has faked his own death. Yes, he's a terrorist who terrorizes people in secret... wait, what? Also, President Grant is shocked, shocked!, that someone would wage war on civilians.
ETA7: Mortally wounded, Jonah Hex happens upon some Indians, who smoke peace pipes and restore his HP to a hundred. Then he immediately leaves. Whoa. At least Mystical Negros get lines.
ETA8: Jonah Hex gets a cute dog sidekick. Because deep down, he's nice, you see.
ETA9: Agent Broyles and Lincoln Lee are in this. So I guess this is what happens to the Fringe universe after Peter ceases to exist.
ETA: Just because Jonah Hex fought for the Confederacy doesn't mean he's a racist. He has a black friend! Yes, there's an entire scene dedicated just to that.
ETA2: WB logic: Wonder Woman movie directed by Joss Whedon--bad idea. Jonah Hex movie from the director of Horton Hears A Who, with Josh Brolin and Megan Fox as the star couple--good idea.
ETA3: There's a scene where Magneto shoots Hex with a double-barrel shotgun--which doesn't kill him, so I guess Hex is effectively immortal in this--again, in a movie where the big threat is our hero being shot, why is he able to shrug off being shot? That takes all the tension out of the shoot-outs. Anyway, Hex gets shot, Magneto taunts him... lets him get to his feet and take a shot... then turns his back on Hex and farts around for a while before acting surprised that Hex manages to get away. And despite Hex being mortally wounded and there being a whole army behind him, no one thinks to go after him. I mean, geez, even the old Lone Ranger serials would be ashamed of that one.
ETA4: Dear Megan Fox hooker, based on my knowledge of the "fancies fellows" demographic, if Michael Fassbender walks into your room, the response is not "I'm done for the night." The response is "Half off!" and you're referring to clothes.
ETA5: I know John Malkovich is a good actor, but if he's your heavy, maybe don't put him in a fistfight with Josh Brolin? Since Malkovich is a geriatric? I mean, c'mon.
ETA6: By the way, Malkovich's character is a Confederate terrorist (yes, they call him that) who has faked his own death. Yes, he's a terrorist who terrorizes people in secret... wait, what? Also, President Grant is shocked, shocked!, that someone would wage war on civilians.
ETA7: Mortally wounded, Jonah Hex happens upon some Indians, who smoke peace pipes and restore his HP to a hundred. Then he immediately leaves. Whoa. At least Mystical Negros get lines.
ETA8: Jonah Hex gets a cute dog sidekick. Because deep down, he's nice, you see.
ETA9: Agent Broyles and Lincoln Lee are in this. So I guess this is what happens to the Fringe universe after Peter ceases to exist.
