They would've called it "Turn On The Night," but the Batman people got offended

[seriousfic]

So you've all heard about this Spider-Man musical? The one that we all mock, but secretly kinda want to see just so we can react to BND news with "Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark was more in-character than this"? Well, one of the actresses was injured, as will generally happen when you use theatre kids for stunts instead of highly-trained stuntmen, and has been replaced by her understudy, America Olivo.

In plain English, Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark is now zero degrees of separation from Bitch Slap. Which is the most apropos sentence in the English language.