Gentlemen, you may be wondering why I've called you here today.

[seriousfic]

From the Bat-Friending Meme thru which I know some of you, and general chatter across the Internet, we all know that Robin isn't the first choice for importation into the Nolanverse, with even Christian Bale saying I would rather have rabid ferrels dropped into my pantaloons then film a scene with a little boy in sparkly green panties calling me 'sir' (paraphrased).

On the other hand, several have said that Batman needs a Robin and Robin is an integral part of the mythos, with the fact that many of them ship Bruce/Robin pairings and think Dick Grayson is "hotness in pixie shoes" (paraphrased) being totally coincidental.

What's the solution? I think that should be obvious.

WENDY WATSON!ROBIN.





You say Robin is the light to Batman's darkness? Check this shit out:



Batman: My parents are deeead!



Wendy Watson: (in SEKRIT IDENTITY with mild-mannered glasses!) Cheer up, it can't be all that bad!



Batman: LOL kay! (paraphrased)

Comments

[parsimonia.livejournal.com]

Another female Robin would be awesome, though I still think Batgirl would make more sense.

[seriousfic.livejournal.com]

Burn on Batgirl! The only thing she did better than Wendy Watson was get paralyzed and turn evil.

[parsimonia.livejournal.com]

You know...Oracle would make a good supervillain if she were to go that route.

...it might help if I knew who Wendy Watson was. A quick googling identifies here as an English cricket player. Somehow, I don't think that's who you're talking about.

[seriousfic.livejournal.com]

She's basically the Companion to the Middleman's Doctor. So she has experience being a sidekick, although the Middleman is a much better boss than Batman.

Also, she looks endlessly cute in a buttondown shirt and tie.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

The obvious answer is to give the boy some pants and make him and Barbara Gordon be 14 and he shall think she is cute and then in the fourth movie, she will be Batgirl, and they shall have a sidekick faceoff.

And she will not be blonde.

[seriousfic.livejournal.com]

I'm really uncomfortable with putting a 14-year-old in a Batgirl costume. Can it be that Hollywood 14, where she's played by... Kristen Bell or something?

Weirdest costuming decision of the nineties: Giving Chris O'Donell a costume with pants, then putting rubber nipples on it. Talk about yer mixed messages...

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

I'm assuming a gap of a few years between the 3rd and 4th movies.

We ignore the rubber nipples. They didn't happen.

[seriousfic.livejournal.com]

We'd have to hope like hell that the girl they hired didn't get crowbarred by puberty. Then again, no one cares that in the X-Men trilogy, there are characters that got recast in every installment (I have this image in my head of Kitty Pryde evolving like a Pokemon until she became Ellen Page).

[box-in-the-box.livejournal.com]

We really do need more nerdy, dorky, geeky slutty female superheroes.

[seriousfic.livejournal.com]

Really? Because Wendy and Lacey are MARRYING IT UP to the degree that were there to be a Batman/Middleman crossover, there would have to be a scene where they double-dated with Babs and Dinah.

Of course, the conversation on jerk ex-boyfriends would be awkward.

Wendy: My ex broke up with me, taped it, posted it on the Internet, and got a movie deal.

Barbara: My ex showed up at my doorstep after being brutalized and in clear need of help, so I kicked him out the next morning, leading to his eventual rape.

Wendy: ...

Dinah: Yeah, she's still a better S.O. than Ollie.

[mcity.livejournal.com]

After the film was over, I actually considered whether the Nolanverse could take a Robin. I had already discarded the idea by the time I reached the door, but it's nice to know we're thinking along similar paths.