seriousfic

Unbeknownst to many, Martin Campbell's 2006 reboot of the James Bond franchise was originally intended to be even more radical. Bond wouldn't be blond, but a babe!

Following the failure of a Halle Berry Jinx spin-off to arise from Die Another Day, the producers seriously considered reviving the moribund series by applying the concept of a take-charge female secret agent to Bond himself. The idea got so far as a script draft depicting 'Jane Bond' as a bisexual 007, just as sexually voracious as ever. Tabrett Bethell, who had already tested for the role of Vesper, shot a 'chemistry test' with stage actress Bridget Regan, who had impressed producers by coming to her audition in a finely-cut tuxedo.

Later, the idea's main backer, producer Roy McCoy, was diagnosed with dementia and Daniel Craig was hired. But the ripples of the almost-film still traveled, with Bethell and Regan starting up a friendship that led to Bethell being cast in the second season of Regan's show, Legend of the Seeker. The pair is now working on a spoken-word album, Fear of Virginia Woolf.

Here now are exclusive images from their screen test, along with excerpts from the script, showing what might have been.

INT. DINING CAR, TRAVELING – NIGHT

Bond looks up from her menu to see the beauty from the platform enter the dining carriage, wearing a no-nonsense but well-fitted suit. She steps to her table.

VESPER
I'm the money.

BOND
Every penny of it.

Vesper sits, darts a look, Bond feigns innocence. She hands over a business card, the type every bureaucrat has.

VESPER
The Treasury has agreed to stake you in the game.

BOND
(examining card)
'Vesper'? I hope you gave your parents hell for that.

VESPER
Your boss must have some influence. I've never seen so much go out the door so quickly.

BOND
Or so stylishly. May I ask where it is?

VESPER
Ten million was wired to your account in Montenegro, with a contingency for five million more, if I deem it a prudent investment.
(as if "just curious":)
I suppose you've given some thought to the notion that if you lose, our government will have directly financed terrorism.
(re: menu)
What looks good?

Bond studies her with a smile, signals the waiter.

INT. DINING CAR, TRAVELING – NIGHT

As the train rattles through the dramatic landscape Bond and Vesper are finishing the meal.

VESPER
Oh, so, you're telling me it's a matter of probability and odds; I was worried there was some chance involved.

BOND
Only if one assumes that the person with the best hand always wins.

VESPER
So that would be what you call "bluffing"?

BOND
(can play right back; accepts menu from porter)
You know the term. Then you may have also heard that in poker you don't play your hand, you play the man across from you.

VESPER
And you're good at reading people.

BOND
Which is why I've been able to detect the undercurrent of sarcasm in your voice.

VESPER
I am now assured our money is in good hands.

BOND
From which one might surmise you aren't overwhelmingly supportive of this plan of action.

VESPER
So there is a plan? Excellent. Somehow I got the impression we were risking ten million dollars and hundreds of people's lives on a game of luck. What else can you surmise?

BOND
About you?...
(studies her, enjoying this)
Well. Your beauty is a problem. You worry that you won't be taken seriously…

VESPER
Which one can say of any attractive woman with two brain cells.

BOND
True, but this one overcompensates by wearing slightly masculine clothing and being more aggressive than her female colleagues, which gives her a somewhat prickly demeanor and, ironically, makes her less likely to be accepted and promoted by her male superiors, who mistake her insecurity for arrogance. I would normally have said only child, but by the way you ignored the quip about your name and your parents I would go with… orphan?

Vesper pretends not to be both stung and impressed. Bond pretends not to gloat. Vesper sizes her up.

VESPER
My turn.

Then this trips off her tongue at light speed:

VESPER
By the cut of your suit you went to Oxford or wherever and actually think human beings dress like that. But you wear it with such disdain, that my guess is you didn't come from money and all your school chums rubbed that in your face every day, which means you were at that school by the grace of someone else's charity, hence the chip on your shoulder. And since your first thought about me ran to orphan, that's what I'd say you are.
(sees a slight reaction)
Oo, you are. I like this poker thing. And that makes perfect sense, since MI6 looks for maladjusted young women who'd give little thought to sacrificing others in order to protect queen and country. You know, former SAS types with easy smiles and expensive watches—
(re: Bond's)
Rolex?

BOND
--Omega.

VESPER
--beautiful. Now, having just met you I wouldn't go as far as calling you a cold-hearted bastard—

BOND
--Of course not—

VESPER
--but it wouldn't be a stretch to imagine that you think of women as disposable pleasures rather than meaningful pursuits, so as charming as you are, I will be keeping my eye on our government's money and off your perfectly formed ass.

BOND
You noticed.

VESPER
Even accountants have imaginations. How was your lamb?

BOND
Skewered. One sympathizes.

VESPER
Good evening, Ms. Bond.

BOND
Good evening, Miss Lynd.

And she watches her walk away, breathless and in wonder.