The Smurfette Principle

[seriousfic]

Working at a theater, I'm surrounded by Smurfs advertisement. Let me tell you something--in every one of them, the Smurfs are doing something that displays their personality trait. Grouchy has his arms crossed really surly, Clumsy is tripping, Brainy has a laptop, Grandpa Smurf has sunglasses because we can't think of something for him to do so let's just give him sunglasses because we're really uncreative and the only way we can express "whacky fun!" is to put sunglasses on something that normally doesn't wear sunglasses, like a dog or a Smurf. But Smurfette's personality trait is always that she's a girl. I've checked. In one, she's applying lipstick, in another, she's flouncing her hair, and in this one standee where the Smurfs are supposedly getting caught in a subway door but it doesn't kill them (for they cannot die, pitiful humans, your world cannot comprehend their evil, much less contest it!), she's the only Smurf who is caught so that she's full-on mooning the audience.

Also, they cast Katy Perry to play her. Katy Perry isn't an actress. Everyone else, they at least cast a comedian (and George Lopez), but for Smurfette, they just cast a hot chick. Even I can see the sexism in that, and I have failed to burn people in effigy for using the term 'mind rape'. (Has anyone even come up with an alternative to that term?)

Comments

[nonky.livejournal.com]

I have been working on this 'mind rape' terminology gap. Unfortunately, every alternative seems to contain either 'blasting' or 'thought,' both of which are pretty controversial things to even mention to the internet. I also considered forming a 'mind rape think tank' but worried about what kind of characters I'd be acquainting myself with. (And then what to call it, because until we did our think-tanking, we would just have to use a blank where 'mind rape' would be.)

RE: Katy Perry as an actress - the one thing The Smurfs will have to answer is why there is only one girl. It's like a little blue gangbang waiting to happen. They had to anticipate this problem and their solution was to hire eye candy. It might be official that Smurfette has been the village whore all along. No wonder those kid smurfs who appeared seemed to wander around without parents - it could be Smurfette and literally any blue guy. Except Grandpa Smurf, because that would be gross.

[geonncannon.livejournal.com]

Not just her personality trait, her name is basically the equivalent of "Human Female." If she was the first female Smurf to ever be born, and they're named according to their personalities, she really should have been dubbed "Dickless Smurf" from the very beginning. Or "Boob Smurf."

Boob Smurf would be an awesome name for a band.

[jlbarnett.livejournal.com]

she was the first female smurf ever created. In the cartoon Gargamel created her to help him find them so he could catch them for whatver he was planning to do with them, but she rejected him eventually and Papa smurf came up with a way for her to survive