Adventures in Submission (MANUSCRIPTS, you pervs)

[seriousfic]

So, wait, I've pimped my query letter, and now I have to write a synopsis? Doesn't this seem skewed to anyone? I can bring a woman to orgasm with prose. Really, literary types, I think you should be the ones coming to me.


"Calm yourself, seriousfic. The true gladiator never allows a three-page synopsis to overcome him."

Why, it's the Doctore from Spartacus: Blood And Sand! Tell me, how do I write a synopsis that isn't lifeless and dull. Let's face it, they probably won't buy "then there's an awesome action sequence where the hero tells this really funny joke about Wizards of Waverly Place."


"Do not fear the synopsis. You must hold it, caress it. You must fuck the synopsis."

I'm pretty sure that's illegal in the great state of Texas.

...

You know, this is why everyone likes the Kirk Douglas version better.

Comments

[dharma-slut.livejournal.com]

It's hard to concentrate when the teacher is poking at you with a barbecue fork!

Especially when he looks so damn good doing it...

[azarias.livejournal.com]

I've given up on Spartacus, but I'm gonna slash Doctore and that hot guy from the Old Spice commercials. Thought you should know.