Jun. 27th, 2008

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Call it Shoot ‘Em Up with less brains or The MatriX-TREME!!! More likely, call it Fight Club without the introspection or Office Space with cartoon visuals or just plain wasted potential. Wanted tells the story of that most oppressed of minorities, the middle-class white straight male: Wesley Gibson, whose Mark Millar self-insert status is made clear by the final frames (check the nameplate in the last voiceover). His girlfriend is screwing his best friend, his boss (a “teehee, aren’t I edgy?” black bitch in the comics, a more politically correct fat bitch in the movie) is a bitch, and his father skipped out on him when he was six weeks old. He needs to get away from the dullery of office work to become a man. More to the point, he needs to ditch his respect and courtesy for the common rabble to wrap himself up in the same smugly obnoxious (obnoxiously smug?) white-boy entitlement as Jumper's David Rice, a transformation heralded by the requisite butt rock. Beverly Hills, that's where he wants to be, rolling like a celebrity.

And how does he find out who he is? By reconnecting with the memory of dear old dad, which will help him rediscover his masculinity. No mention is made of his mother, who presumably raised him after his dad skipped out. Indeed, she may even be responsible for his momma’s boy status. Wesley has ninety-nine problems and a bitch is ninety.

From there on, it becomes The Matrix-by-way-of-the-Matrix-sequels. (minor spoilers) )

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