Genderswap in femslash, you say?

[seriousfic]

(This won't make sense unless you've been following some of the meta going around femslash circles. Well, it'll make less sense.)

My secret shame... I have a femslash genderswap idea. It's Hollows-fic... yes, the Hollows of the eternally woe-betiding Rachel and her "woe is me, I am in love with Ivy but she is a GIRL and she has GIRL BITS and yet I also have GIRL BITS and this DOES NOT COMPUTE." Because Rachel is so hetero you brings to mind some hellish SNL character played straight. Heteronormitivity Girl, perhaps. She literally cannot meet a guy without thinking about boning him and, contrasted with her prudishness with the VERY long-suffering Ivy, it gets FRUSTRATING LIKE WHOA.

So, in one of my more vindictive moments, I came up with this.

Rachel: OH, HEART, ALACK, I AM IN LOVE WITH IVY AND YET SHE DOES NOT HAVE A PENIS! WHAT AM I TO DO?

Ivy: You know, canonically, there are charms capable of altering appearances. What if I put on this charm that turned me into a man?

Rachel: Uh...

Ivy: Hmm... it's more dangly than I expected...

Rachel's Ovaries: DO WANT DO WANT DO WANT DO WANT!

Rachel: Shut up! It's Ivy! She's a girl and she... girly bits... hetero to the bone...

Ivy: Now it's getting stiff...

Rachel: NOM NOM NOM NOM!

**Some Highly Literal Genderfuckery Later**

Rachel: **internal monologue o' doom and sexual confusion**

Ivy: **takes off charm**

Rachel's Ovaries: STILL WANT STILL WANT STILL WANT!

Rachel: You turned my ovaries against me!

Ivy: Finely-honed master plan: 1. "Gut instinct": Zip.

Rachel: ...well-played. Now buy a strap-on.

**snugglin'**








And that's my plan!