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seriousficTitle: Not A Fairy Tale Romance
Fandom: Once Upon A Time
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,443
Characters/Pairings: Regina/Emma
Notes: This fic is an AU as of 1x07 - The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter
Previous: Part 8
Summary: Regina's punishment.
Emma felt like she was being torn apart. On one side was the woman she loved, the woman who'd raised her son, the woman she'd fought for and killed for and knew better than anyone. On the other side was the woman who'd effectively orphaned her, who'd condemned her to a childhood of foster homes and orphanages, who'd hurt everyone she'd come to care about here. The same person, pulling her in different directions.
And then there were her parents, her friends, who wanted revenge and almost every part of Emma could admit they deserved it. If it were anyone else, she'd be there with them. But it was Regina. Emma loved her. She hated her.
Emma sat behind her desk, the shotgun on top of her desk, its bullets around it. She didn't know what she'd do with it if someone forced their way in. Maybe turn it on herself. She was being pulled in three directions at once and all she could do was stand there and see which ended up with the bigger piece.
Regina was sitting in the jail cell, a black hole. She didn't face the wire-mesh window or the bars, but instead the mirror at the sink. Confronting the reflection in the corner of her eye. The mob threw bricks and bottles. They all ricocheted off the covered window, but sometimes a bottle shattered and sprayed Regina with flecks of beer. It put Emma in mind of tears.
David was there too, completing the triangle. He paced in front of the bars like Graham himself had, back when Emma was in there. The Sheriff hadn't showed since this whole mess started. Emma guessed that left her in charge. What an awful idea.
Regina spoke at last, finally fixing David with a stare. Maybe he made a bigger target than Emma. "You're not expecting me to take you seriously, are you? Your highness? I just find it so difficult to forget that in the absence of the adoration and respect you're accustomed to, you're just a pathetic little man who can't even choose between two women. It had to be done for you."
"You're right not to try to curry favor," David replied. "It wouldn't do you any good."
"Then I guess she must get it from her mother."
David put himself against the bars. "Who?"
"Your daughter. She didn't seem to have an objection to me 'currying favor'."
At the desk, Emma ran a hand through her hair.
"Don't remind me of my daughter if you hope to live through this," David said tersely.
"Do you think me a hypocrite? I don't hope for anything. That's why I stripped it all from you. I wished to share the bounty of nihilism."
David put his hands on the bars like he was holding himself back. "You're not expecting me to take you seriously, are you? A lonely old woman who bought an orphan to feel better about herself. Without your magic, you're just a snake in the grass. You'll hiss until a shovel cuts your head from your body."
"For God's sake, get on with it," Emma said. Her voice sounded hoarse. Rusted.
"Yes, stepfather," Regina drawled. "Please do."
David went to the doors and flung them open. The light was let out onto the crowd, revealing baleful faces and clenched fists. A collective intake of breath went through them.
"Regina Mills, Queen of Vernillax. You have enacted grievous magic against the people of my kingdom, including the woman I loved. You have separated the children Hansel and Gretel from their father. You have taken prisoner the maiden Belle. You have held captive the woodsman Graham for your own sick amusement."
"I hardly got the pleasure out of him that you think I did," Regina scoffed. "I prefer blondes. Besides, the man smelled like wet dog after every bath."
"A woman found guilty of these crimes cannot be permitted to live within my kingdom." David turned to the crowd, seeming to meet their eyes each in turn. "But… my daughter has feelings for this woman. She was deceived, as we all were. But I have no desire to let Regina do more harm, even the harm that would come of Emma… losing her." He turned to Emma, nodded. She lunged for the keys as he looked at Regina. "Thus, I will spare your life, Regina Mills. But you are hereby banished from Storybrooke, on pain of death. Never to return. You have an hour to gather your things. Emma will see you out."
Regina's expression barely changed as Emma opened the cell. It stayed frozen on her face. Maybe it had been for a while, but the cracks were just showing now. "And… the boy?"
"We'll let him decide," Emma said, trying her best to be assuring.
Hand on her belt, the heel of it against her holstered sidearm, Emma led Regina out the door. The mob stepped aside and kept their hands down, but the things they said as Regina passed Emma wouldn't repeat for a million dollars. Emma had her hand on Regina's shoulder to keep her going, make sure she didn't run, and she felt Regina shake. There was still a tremble in her when they got to the squad car. Emma opened the backdoor and helped Regina inside.
"Just like old times," Regina said quietly.
Emma got into the front seat. Almost by default, she had resolved to ignore Regina. There just wasn't anything she could think to say.
***
Mary Margaret was with Henry, at Regina's house. They were waiting outside on the porch. As soon as he saw the car coming, he ran down to the curb. When Emma stopped it, he was standing in front of the window Regina sat by. Emma rolled it down for her. She left them alone, going up to Mary Margaret, looking in the front door to make sure no one was lying in wait to ambush Regina.
"I don't like it," Emma said, almost to herself. "Letting Henry choose. It's too much pressure on him."
"He'll choose you. And Regina won't fight it this way. That's best for everyone."
Emma was sure it wasn't best for her. "Get his stuff together. He's not staying here tonight."
Mary Margaret nodded. Emma walked back to the car. Regina was staring straight ahead, like she had in the jail cell, like she was posing for a portrait. Henry was staring at her. "I didn't mean to," he was saying when Emma got into earshot.
"Henry, you ready?" Emma asked. She wasn't sure what he was supposed to be ready for either, but it seemed a maternal thing to say.
"He hasn't said goodbye yet." Regina's thousand-yard stare took in the rear-view mirror like she was scanning a crowded airport for an old friend. Her eyes fidgeted in their sockets. "It may not be in his vocabulary. I'll expect you to correct his schooling as necessary."
Henry turned around to face Emma. "I'm going with her."
"No!" Regina said, before Emma could even react.
"Why not?" and Emma had heard the same words from Henry before, in a whining falsetto, but this was plaintive, hurt, a plea. He looked between them like they were conspiring together.
Emma felt Regina's eyes pass over her in their death-rattle twitching. "In the outside world, I have no power. No wealth. I won't be able to provide for you. Here, you'll want for nothing—"
"I don't care!" Henry interrupted. "I don't care how many arguments you have, I'm coming with you!"
"Why?" Regina snapped, looking at him like he was the only thing that could fuel her anger.
"You're my mom."
Regina looked at Emma. She bit her lip until she drew blood. "Get him away from me. I don't want him. He's yours. Not mine."
Emma stared at Regina, who stared right back. Stalemate. Emma couldn't take her eyes away. For as long as she'd known Regina, she'd had a mask up. Even when it'd slipped, she'd hidden her true face with anger. Only toward the end had she started to let Emma in, revealing someone so scarred and hurting that Emma was amazed she could stand.
And now the inverse was happening. Regina's armor was cracking apart, but she wasn't taking it off, it was being stripped from her, battered at by forces beyond her control. Her eyes were turning a veiny shade of red, her face going pale, tears blazing new paths down her hollow cheeks. It was like watching a beautiful, imposing statue go through a thousand years' of decay in moments.
"Please," Regina said at last, and Emma turned back to cry out "Mom!" and Mary Margaret came running. She took Henry's hand and pulled him away.
Emma got closer to the car like she was collapsing on it.
"I never wanted him," Regina said through her tears, lying so badly she almost choked on the words. "I never loved him. He was a b-burden to me from the start! You're welcome to him! I should've… should've…"
"You're not," Emma said, with a kind of wonder.
Regina just looked at her, as Emma wiped her tears.
"You're not that person," Emma continued. "The evil queen, she doesn’t exist. Maybe she did once, but now there's just you. Someone who could give up the only person she loves because she thinks it's best for him." She knelt down to put herself face to face with Regina. There was a hesitant hope entering Regina's face. Even as she couldn't believe it, she let herself be soothed by Emma's voice like a lion waiting to have a thorn taken from its paw. "But it's not. I don't think Henry'd ever get over losing you. And I wouldn't either."
"Don't mock me." The thought crept into Regina, strickening her. "I know I deserve it, but please…"
"I would never."
Regina moaned deeply, an animal sound, raw hunger and need. Emma held onto her face even after she'd pulled away. Regina held herself there, eyes closed, until her arms came up. She wrapped Emma up. Almost as a surprise, Emma felt Regina's arms around her, pulling her back in. Regina couldn't manage a kiss, so she just embraced Emma. She didn't have much strength in her, but all she had pulled them together. A breath, a sniffle, then Regina was back, breaking away with her face almost composed. "Emma. I would appreciate it if you helped us pack."
"Make it quick. We have to pick up my things too." For a second, Regina looked like she would break all over again. "I'm coming with you."
***
They left Storybrooke in the middle of the night. Emma wondered if that made it easier for Henry, not seeing any of what he was leaving behind. She drove, not trusting Regina with it, though the SUV handled like a bucking bronco. But it held most of their valuables. Regina was convinced the 'peasants' would loot and burn her house. Emma thought she underestimated how much they feared her.
Regina sat in the backseat, Henry in her lap. It hadn't been her choice; far too unsafe. But as soon as Regina had gotten into the car next to him, Henry had hugged her and not let go.
The dark road repelled Emma's eyes, driving them toward the rear-view mirror. She couldn't stop looking at Regina. Emma kept trying to see her as the villain of the story, but how could she? How could she not?
When the sun finally put in an appearance, she decided Josh must be up. Stifling a yawn, she dug her phone out of her purse.
"Who are you calling?" Regina croaked. Emma hadn't known she was awake. Her chin was down on Henry's head.
"Josh Lewis. He's an old friend. He might put us up for the night."
"Can you trust him?" Regina insisted.
Imagine her, asking that. "He's not secretly an evil fairy tale, if that's what you're asking."
Emma almost regretted it, the way Regina folded in on herself. "It's not safe to use a cell phone while driving."
"I'll be careful."
As it turned out, Josh was out of town. He told Emma she could use his loft.
Henry woke up shortly after. He stared out at the skyscrapers of Boston, gleaming with the morning sun. Regina scratched his back.
***
Josh's apartment was just like Emma remembered it, which made it like stepping into another world. All the black leather and brown oak reminded her of Regina's house, another kind of monochrome.
Henry treated the unfamiliar like a toy store, as all little boys did. Regina trailed behind him, taking the responsibility of not letting him touch anything expensive.
Emma decoded the satellite TV remote enough to find Henry some cartoons and he fell asleep during the first commercial break. With a glance between them, they decided to leave him on the couch. Regina took off her coat and covered Henry from the neck down. Without its concealment, the woman looked diminished. She didn't have the mayorhood. She didn't have Storybrooke. Her shoulders looked bony and bare. It hurt Emma's eyes to look at her.
The bedroom was unfamiliar, which was actually comforting. She didn't want to be reminded of anything at the moment. After an hour of tossing and turning, the door opened. It didn't let in any light or make any sound, but Emma could hear the air currents change. Regina padded to the foot of the bed, her hand alighting on the bedpost with a click of nails. Emma felt herself shiver, but she didn't know why.
After a thick pause, Regina moved again, now undressing herself. Emma heard the weight of her suit jacket and the length of her trousers against the floor. Panties and undershirt, then. The thought sent memories tumbling through Emma, but none of them awakened any desire or fondness. Even their little game of cops and robbers felt like it had happened to someone else.
Regina crossed over to Emma's side of the bed, standing over her like a specter. Se got down on one knee. Her weight hit the floor with a dull thud. Her fingers parted the veil of hair over Emma's face to find her staring back. And Regina moved in for the kiss. The happy ending. Her happily ever after.
Their kiss went down like perfect poison—colorless, odorless, tasteless. "I don't want you to do that again," Emma said when it was over. "I thought I could do this, but I can't. I'll stay with you for Henry's sake, but that's all this is."
Fandom: Once Upon A Time
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,443
Characters/Pairings: Regina/Emma
Notes: This fic is an AU as of 1x07 - The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter
Previous: Part 8
Summary: Regina's punishment.
Emma felt like she was being torn apart. On one side was the woman she loved, the woman who'd raised her son, the woman she'd fought for and killed for and knew better than anyone. On the other side was the woman who'd effectively orphaned her, who'd condemned her to a childhood of foster homes and orphanages, who'd hurt everyone she'd come to care about here. The same person, pulling her in different directions.
And then there were her parents, her friends, who wanted revenge and almost every part of Emma could admit they deserved it. If it were anyone else, she'd be there with them. But it was Regina. Emma loved her. She hated her.
Emma sat behind her desk, the shotgun on top of her desk, its bullets around it. She didn't know what she'd do with it if someone forced their way in. Maybe turn it on herself. She was being pulled in three directions at once and all she could do was stand there and see which ended up with the bigger piece.
Regina was sitting in the jail cell, a black hole. She didn't face the wire-mesh window or the bars, but instead the mirror at the sink. Confronting the reflection in the corner of her eye. The mob threw bricks and bottles. They all ricocheted off the covered window, but sometimes a bottle shattered and sprayed Regina with flecks of beer. It put Emma in mind of tears.
David was there too, completing the triangle. He paced in front of the bars like Graham himself had, back when Emma was in there. The Sheriff hadn't showed since this whole mess started. Emma guessed that left her in charge. What an awful idea.
Regina spoke at last, finally fixing David with a stare. Maybe he made a bigger target than Emma. "You're not expecting me to take you seriously, are you? Your highness? I just find it so difficult to forget that in the absence of the adoration and respect you're accustomed to, you're just a pathetic little man who can't even choose between two women. It had to be done for you."
"You're right not to try to curry favor," David replied. "It wouldn't do you any good."
"Then I guess she must get it from her mother."
David put himself against the bars. "Who?"
"Your daughter. She didn't seem to have an objection to me 'currying favor'."
At the desk, Emma ran a hand through her hair.
"Don't remind me of my daughter if you hope to live through this," David said tersely.
"Do you think me a hypocrite? I don't hope for anything. That's why I stripped it all from you. I wished to share the bounty of nihilism."
David put his hands on the bars like he was holding himself back. "You're not expecting me to take you seriously, are you? A lonely old woman who bought an orphan to feel better about herself. Without your magic, you're just a snake in the grass. You'll hiss until a shovel cuts your head from your body."
"For God's sake, get on with it," Emma said. Her voice sounded hoarse. Rusted.
"Yes, stepfather," Regina drawled. "Please do."
David went to the doors and flung them open. The light was let out onto the crowd, revealing baleful faces and clenched fists. A collective intake of breath went through them.
"Regina Mills, Queen of Vernillax. You have enacted grievous magic against the people of my kingdom, including the woman I loved. You have separated the children Hansel and Gretel from their father. You have taken prisoner the maiden Belle. You have held captive the woodsman Graham for your own sick amusement."
"I hardly got the pleasure out of him that you think I did," Regina scoffed. "I prefer blondes. Besides, the man smelled like wet dog after every bath."
"A woman found guilty of these crimes cannot be permitted to live within my kingdom." David turned to the crowd, seeming to meet their eyes each in turn. "But… my daughter has feelings for this woman. She was deceived, as we all were. But I have no desire to let Regina do more harm, even the harm that would come of Emma… losing her." He turned to Emma, nodded. She lunged for the keys as he looked at Regina. "Thus, I will spare your life, Regina Mills. But you are hereby banished from Storybrooke, on pain of death. Never to return. You have an hour to gather your things. Emma will see you out."
Regina's expression barely changed as Emma opened the cell. It stayed frozen on her face. Maybe it had been for a while, but the cracks were just showing now. "And… the boy?"
"We'll let him decide," Emma said, trying her best to be assuring.
Hand on her belt, the heel of it against her holstered sidearm, Emma led Regina out the door. The mob stepped aside and kept their hands down, but the things they said as Regina passed Emma wouldn't repeat for a million dollars. Emma had her hand on Regina's shoulder to keep her going, make sure she didn't run, and she felt Regina shake. There was still a tremble in her when they got to the squad car. Emma opened the backdoor and helped Regina inside.
"Just like old times," Regina said quietly.
Emma got into the front seat. Almost by default, she had resolved to ignore Regina. There just wasn't anything she could think to say.
***
Mary Margaret was with Henry, at Regina's house. They were waiting outside on the porch. As soon as he saw the car coming, he ran down to the curb. When Emma stopped it, he was standing in front of the window Regina sat by. Emma rolled it down for her. She left them alone, going up to Mary Margaret, looking in the front door to make sure no one was lying in wait to ambush Regina.
"I don't like it," Emma said, almost to herself. "Letting Henry choose. It's too much pressure on him."
"He'll choose you. And Regina won't fight it this way. That's best for everyone."
Emma was sure it wasn't best for her. "Get his stuff together. He's not staying here tonight."
Mary Margaret nodded. Emma walked back to the car. Regina was staring straight ahead, like she had in the jail cell, like she was posing for a portrait. Henry was staring at her. "I didn't mean to," he was saying when Emma got into earshot.
"Henry, you ready?" Emma asked. She wasn't sure what he was supposed to be ready for either, but it seemed a maternal thing to say.
"He hasn't said goodbye yet." Regina's thousand-yard stare took in the rear-view mirror like she was scanning a crowded airport for an old friend. Her eyes fidgeted in their sockets. "It may not be in his vocabulary. I'll expect you to correct his schooling as necessary."
Henry turned around to face Emma. "I'm going with her."
"No!" Regina said, before Emma could even react.
"Why not?" and Emma had heard the same words from Henry before, in a whining falsetto, but this was plaintive, hurt, a plea. He looked between them like they were conspiring together.
Emma felt Regina's eyes pass over her in their death-rattle twitching. "In the outside world, I have no power. No wealth. I won't be able to provide for you. Here, you'll want for nothing—"
"I don't care!" Henry interrupted. "I don't care how many arguments you have, I'm coming with you!"
"Why?" Regina snapped, looking at him like he was the only thing that could fuel her anger.
"You're my mom."
Regina looked at Emma. She bit her lip until she drew blood. "Get him away from me. I don't want him. He's yours. Not mine."
Emma stared at Regina, who stared right back. Stalemate. Emma couldn't take her eyes away. For as long as she'd known Regina, she'd had a mask up. Even when it'd slipped, she'd hidden her true face with anger. Only toward the end had she started to let Emma in, revealing someone so scarred and hurting that Emma was amazed she could stand.
And now the inverse was happening. Regina's armor was cracking apart, but she wasn't taking it off, it was being stripped from her, battered at by forces beyond her control. Her eyes were turning a veiny shade of red, her face going pale, tears blazing new paths down her hollow cheeks. It was like watching a beautiful, imposing statue go through a thousand years' of decay in moments.
"Please," Regina said at last, and Emma turned back to cry out "Mom!" and Mary Margaret came running. She took Henry's hand and pulled him away.
Emma got closer to the car like she was collapsing on it.
"I never wanted him," Regina said through her tears, lying so badly she almost choked on the words. "I never loved him. He was a b-burden to me from the start! You're welcome to him! I should've… should've…"
"You're not," Emma said, with a kind of wonder.
Regina just looked at her, as Emma wiped her tears.
"You're not that person," Emma continued. "The evil queen, she doesn’t exist. Maybe she did once, but now there's just you. Someone who could give up the only person she loves because she thinks it's best for him." She knelt down to put herself face to face with Regina. There was a hesitant hope entering Regina's face. Even as she couldn't believe it, she let herself be soothed by Emma's voice like a lion waiting to have a thorn taken from its paw. "But it's not. I don't think Henry'd ever get over losing you. And I wouldn't either."
"Don't mock me." The thought crept into Regina, strickening her. "I know I deserve it, but please…"
"I would never."
Regina moaned deeply, an animal sound, raw hunger and need. Emma held onto her face even after she'd pulled away. Regina held herself there, eyes closed, until her arms came up. She wrapped Emma up. Almost as a surprise, Emma felt Regina's arms around her, pulling her back in. Regina couldn't manage a kiss, so she just embraced Emma. She didn't have much strength in her, but all she had pulled them together. A breath, a sniffle, then Regina was back, breaking away with her face almost composed. "Emma. I would appreciate it if you helped us pack."
"Make it quick. We have to pick up my things too." For a second, Regina looked like she would break all over again. "I'm coming with you."
***
They left Storybrooke in the middle of the night. Emma wondered if that made it easier for Henry, not seeing any of what he was leaving behind. She drove, not trusting Regina with it, though the SUV handled like a bucking bronco. But it held most of their valuables. Regina was convinced the 'peasants' would loot and burn her house. Emma thought she underestimated how much they feared her.
Regina sat in the backseat, Henry in her lap. It hadn't been her choice; far too unsafe. But as soon as Regina had gotten into the car next to him, Henry had hugged her and not let go.
The dark road repelled Emma's eyes, driving them toward the rear-view mirror. She couldn't stop looking at Regina. Emma kept trying to see her as the villain of the story, but how could she? How could she not?
When the sun finally put in an appearance, she decided Josh must be up. Stifling a yawn, she dug her phone out of her purse.
"Who are you calling?" Regina croaked. Emma hadn't known she was awake. Her chin was down on Henry's head.
"Josh Lewis. He's an old friend. He might put us up for the night."
"Can you trust him?" Regina insisted.
Imagine her, asking that. "He's not secretly an evil fairy tale, if that's what you're asking."
Emma almost regretted it, the way Regina folded in on herself. "It's not safe to use a cell phone while driving."
"I'll be careful."
As it turned out, Josh was out of town. He told Emma she could use his loft.
Henry woke up shortly after. He stared out at the skyscrapers of Boston, gleaming with the morning sun. Regina scratched his back.
***
Josh's apartment was just like Emma remembered it, which made it like stepping into another world. All the black leather and brown oak reminded her of Regina's house, another kind of monochrome.
Henry treated the unfamiliar like a toy store, as all little boys did. Regina trailed behind him, taking the responsibility of not letting him touch anything expensive.
Emma decoded the satellite TV remote enough to find Henry some cartoons and he fell asleep during the first commercial break. With a glance between them, they decided to leave him on the couch. Regina took off her coat and covered Henry from the neck down. Without its concealment, the woman looked diminished. She didn't have the mayorhood. She didn't have Storybrooke. Her shoulders looked bony and bare. It hurt Emma's eyes to look at her.
The bedroom was unfamiliar, which was actually comforting. She didn't want to be reminded of anything at the moment. After an hour of tossing and turning, the door opened. It didn't let in any light or make any sound, but Emma could hear the air currents change. Regina padded to the foot of the bed, her hand alighting on the bedpost with a click of nails. Emma felt herself shiver, but she didn't know why.
After a thick pause, Regina moved again, now undressing herself. Emma heard the weight of her suit jacket and the length of her trousers against the floor. Panties and undershirt, then. The thought sent memories tumbling through Emma, but none of them awakened any desire or fondness. Even their little game of cops and robbers felt like it had happened to someone else.
Regina crossed over to Emma's side of the bed, standing over her like a specter. Se got down on one knee. Her weight hit the floor with a dull thud. Her fingers parted the veil of hair over Emma's face to find her staring back. And Regina moved in for the kiss. The happy ending. Her happily ever after.
Their kiss went down like perfect poison—colorless, odorless, tasteless. "I don't want you to do that again," Emma said when it was over. "I thought I could do this, but I can't. I'll stay with you for Henry's sake, but that's all this is."
