Brit Chick: The Pitch
Mar. 30th, 2011 02:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
seriousficIn a less enlightened time, the British Empire plundered the cultural treasures of the world. Although many of these artifacts have been returned, most of them are in the hands of unscrupulous private collectors, out of reach of official scrutiny. If these treasures were returned to their rightful owners, the diplomatic repercussions could be enormous... but the British government must have plausible deniability.
What to do, what to do...
The charmer: Jaime Murray as Sydney Croft
Sydney was always the black sheep of her aristocratic family. Maybe it was her mother's death at an early age, or her father's subsequent absence. But although she breezed through both her courses and her tutors, her true passion seemed to be trouble. Her father's lawyers were always, by the skin of her teeth, getting Sydney out of the legal repercussions of her appetite for soft drugs, hard boys, and fast cars. Then her family lost everything in the recession. Her father's former friends turned their backs on him, and Sydney's father committed suicide before the estranged pair could ever reconcile.
Sydney entered the criminal underworld to get revenge on her family's fairweather friends, using the contacts she'd made during her walks on the wild side (and her own natural charisma) to swindle them for all they were worth. But Sydney soon discovered a passion for the con, and now preys on anyone who can afford to support her lifestyle. She doesn't much like that her new arrangement forces her so share a council flat with a vegan princess and a Jane Bond landlord, so if she sees an opportunity to enrich herself during a job, she'll take it, no questions asked.
But underneath her devil-may-care exterior is a little girl that still misses her parents, and maybe wants something more from life than the next score.
The swiper: Claudia Black as Dina Phelps
As a teenager, the move from Dina's native New Zealand to England drove Dina to act out. She was caught spray-painting Clash lyrics at her school four times, until finally she was sent to juvie. There, she met John Simmons, sixteen-year-old son of famed cat burglar Mason Simmons. The two struck up a friendship, and when they got out, Dina learned everything Mason had to teach them, proving herself a natural prodigy. Now, she works as a cat burglar with a strict code of honor -- living a green lifestyle so she can give more of her haul to charity and only targeting those who have offended her on a political level. She holds Sydney in disdain for "only being able to work on her back," while Sydney sees her as a whole bundle of no-fun. But under the heel of DI Lane, the two form an unlikely alliance that grows into a bond of sisterhood.
The bruiser: Lena Headey as Agent Alex Lane
To Alex Lane, police work was just a job until her husband was killed in a home invasion gone wrong. Taken off the case due to her emotional attachment, Alex watched the months go by with no arrests. When she returned to active duty, she tore into her work, kicking off a meteoric rise to the very top of the London police department, and finally into the ranks of MI-6. There, she took an interest in Sydney and Dina, two cases she was never able to close during her time as a DI. A lucky break resulted in the girls being captured when they tried to rob the same mark at the same time, but Alex knows there's no way a prison could hold them, and she has no desire to cost the taxpayers money punishing two essentially harmless cons. Instead, she made them a deal. Work release into a black-book operation. So long as the Crown got back a certain amount of items a month, they'd ask no questions. Alex would stay on to make sure they only misbehaved away from the British government. And when they get into trouble, Alex never forgets that a license to kill includes pump-action shotguns and car bumpers.
A stolid, irresistible force, Alex cuts the girls little slack at first, but soon finds herself letting friends into her world for the first time since her husband died. But she won't let that get in the way of her mission. All the evidence points to her husband being killed because of his work as an art appraiser, and she'll sacrifice anything to get to the man responsible...
Series: Each week, Alex briefs "her girls" on a new scumbag who has his hands on a piece of stolen artwork and won't give it back. Dina and Sydney spar over sharing a flat (they're the original Odd Couple!) before getting down to business and re-stealing it. Although at first they don't get along, they soon see there's more to each other than meets the eye, and by the season finale they're thick as thieves (say, that might make a better title).
Sydney would be a canon bisexual, because you'd never be able to convince anyone that Jaime Murray is playing a Kinsey Scale zero. Dina would have an ongoing will-they-or-won't-they? with John, which counts as Dating Catwoman since he's an unreformed thief. Somehow, this only makes the lesbian subtext worse.
(Dina: It would never work out between me and him.
Audience: Because you're a huge gaymo?)
Alex, naturally, is Batman, which doesn't do anything to convince anyone that she isn't the fandom bicycle. Piper Perabo eventually guest-stars as her sister, just to torture people. Then Sydney hits on her and it's alllll better.
What to do, what to do...
The charmer: Jaime Murray as Sydney Croft
Sydney was always the black sheep of her aristocratic family. Maybe it was her mother's death at an early age, or her father's subsequent absence. But although she breezed through both her courses and her tutors, her true passion seemed to be trouble. Her father's lawyers were always, by the skin of her teeth, getting Sydney out of the legal repercussions of her appetite for soft drugs, hard boys, and fast cars. Then her family lost everything in the recession. Her father's former friends turned their backs on him, and Sydney's father committed suicide before the estranged pair could ever reconcile.
Sydney entered the criminal underworld to get revenge on her family's fairweather friends, using the contacts she'd made during her walks on the wild side (and her own natural charisma) to swindle them for all they were worth. But Sydney soon discovered a passion for the con, and now preys on anyone who can afford to support her lifestyle. She doesn't much like that her new arrangement forces her so share a council flat with a vegan princess and a Jane Bond landlord, so if she sees an opportunity to enrich herself during a job, she'll take it, no questions asked.
But underneath her devil-may-care exterior is a little girl that still misses her parents, and maybe wants something more from life than the next score.
The swiper: Claudia Black as Dina Phelps
As a teenager, the move from Dina's native New Zealand to England drove Dina to act out. She was caught spray-painting Clash lyrics at her school four times, until finally she was sent to juvie. There, she met John Simmons, sixteen-year-old son of famed cat burglar Mason Simmons. The two struck up a friendship, and when they got out, Dina learned everything Mason had to teach them, proving herself a natural prodigy. Now, she works as a cat burglar with a strict code of honor -- living a green lifestyle so she can give more of her haul to charity and only targeting those who have offended her on a political level. She holds Sydney in disdain for "only being able to work on her back," while Sydney sees her as a whole bundle of no-fun. But under the heel of DI Lane, the two form an unlikely alliance that grows into a bond of sisterhood.
The bruiser: Lena Headey as Agent Alex Lane
To Alex Lane, police work was just a job until her husband was killed in a home invasion gone wrong. Taken off the case due to her emotional attachment, Alex watched the months go by with no arrests. When she returned to active duty, she tore into her work, kicking off a meteoric rise to the very top of the London police department, and finally into the ranks of MI-6. There, she took an interest in Sydney and Dina, two cases she was never able to close during her time as a DI. A lucky break resulted in the girls being captured when they tried to rob the same mark at the same time, but Alex knows there's no way a prison could hold them, and she has no desire to cost the taxpayers money punishing two essentially harmless cons. Instead, she made them a deal. Work release into a black-book operation. So long as the Crown got back a certain amount of items a month, they'd ask no questions. Alex would stay on to make sure they only misbehaved away from the British government. And when they get into trouble, Alex never forgets that a license to kill includes pump-action shotguns and car bumpers.
A stolid, irresistible force, Alex cuts the girls little slack at first, but soon finds herself letting friends into her world for the first time since her husband died. But she won't let that get in the way of her mission. All the evidence points to her husband being killed because of his work as an art appraiser, and she'll sacrifice anything to get to the man responsible...
Series: Each week, Alex briefs "her girls" on a new scumbag who has his hands on a piece of stolen artwork and won't give it back. Dina and Sydney spar over sharing a flat (they're the original Odd Couple!) before getting down to business and re-stealing it. Although at first they don't get along, they soon see there's more to each other than meets the eye, and by the season finale they're thick as thieves (say, that might make a better title).
Sydney would be a canon bisexual, because you'd never be able to convince anyone that Jaime Murray is playing a Kinsey Scale zero. Dina would have an ongoing will-they-or-won't-they? with John, which counts as Dating Catwoman since he's an unreformed thief. Somehow, this only makes the lesbian subtext worse.
(Dina: It would never work out between me and him.
Audience: Because you're a huge gaymo?)
Alex, naturally, is Batman, which doesn't do anything to convince anyone that she isn't the fandom bicycle. Piper Perabo eventually guest-stars as her sister, just to torture people. Then Sydney hits on her and it's alllll better.
