Daredevil, man without prequel
Feb. 9th, 2010 02:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
seriousficSo Fox is rebooting Daredevil. That's the good news, as even the most ardent remake hater would never say "Hey, let's get Ben Affleck back!" And hey, Daredevil is one of the most cinematic characters in Marvel's line-up (I don't think Rocket Raccoon's many soliloquies would translate well to the screen). He's got a costume that looks good on screen, he's got loads of noirish storytelling and "definitive" stories to translate. Hell, before he went crazy, Frank Miller wrote a graphic novel that was pretty much "This is how you turn Daredevil into a movie." Just take that, spruce it up a little... beef up the romantic Elektra subplot so she isn't psychotic, write in Bullseye and have him go through a mental breakdown, give Matt less of a body count. The character's pretty much "Batman, only poorer and Catholic, yet ironically he gets more pussy," so call in Jon Hamm. Then get Monica Belucci for Elektra...
Of course, Monica Belucci looks good in anything. If you put her in stormtrooper armor, Darth Vader would be going "Stormtrooper TA-41 is one sexy minx."
Boom, you're done. Give Brian Michael Bendis a producer's credit and make a trilogy.
Then, the bad news. It's being written by the guy who remade The Day The Earth Stood Still. Yes, someone who took one of the greatest sci-fi films ever made and turned it into the worst movie ever. That takes skill. I mean, I never even would've thought of bringing in Will Smith's son and then turning the most beloved character in sci-fi into a genocidal jerkass.
I imagine that if this guy, David Scarpa, was told to take a naked picture of Megan Fox, you know, she'd come over, take her clothes off, strike a pose, he'd point the camera at her... then he'd say "no, wait," go over there, write some racial epithets on her body, paint her teeth yellow, give her three more Marilyn Monroe tattoos, THEN take the picture. Then he'd go around kicking everyone who saw it in the balls.
Maybe this time Daredevil and Elektra can not fight on a set of see-saws, at least.
Oh, and Superman is getting rebooted, and the WB was actually smart enough to put Christopher Nolan in charge. On the one hand, remember that time the WB said "Hey, Tim Burton made a good Batman movie, he would probably make a good Superman movie!" Not realizing that they were, in fact, different characters? Yeah, grim and gritty worked so well for Superman last time. On the other hand, it would be nice to have someone who actually thinks about plots and characters and rising action in charge. And if anyone can find a good actor to play Superman, it's the guy who saw Heath Ledger and thought "Joker!"
Maybe this time Superman can actually say he fights for truth, justice, and the American Way instead of cutting off that last part. Yeah, if you're too cynical to have Superman fighting for the American Way, you probably shouldn't be writing a Superman movie. Also, if you're homophobic, you might not want to get involved in that Liberace biopic. Sincerely, Captain Obvious.
Of course, Monica Belucci looks good in anything. If you put her in stormtrooper armor, Darth Vader would be going "Stormtrooper TA-41 is one sexy minx."
Boom, you're done. Give Brian Michael Bendis a producer's credit and make a trilogy.
Then, the bad news. It's being written by the guy who remade The Day The Earth Stood Still. Yes, someone who took one of the greatest sci-fi films ever made and turned it into the worst movie ever. That takes skill. I mean, I never even would've thought of bringing in Will Smith's son and then turning the most beloved character in sci-fi into a genocidal jerkass.
I imagine that if this guy, David Scarpa, was told to take a naked picture of Megan Fox, you know, she'd come over, take her clothes off, strike a pose, he'd point the camera at her... then he'd say "no, wait," go over there, write some racial epithets on her body, paint her teeth yellow, give her three more Marilyn Monroe tattoos, THEN take the picture. Then he'd go around kicking everyone who saw it in the balls.
Maybe this time Daredevil and Elektra can not fight on a set of see-saws, at least.
Oh, and Superman is getting rebooted, and the WB was actually smart enough to put Christopher Nolan in charge. On the one hand, remember that time the WB said "Hey, Tim Burton made a good Batman movie, he would probably make a good Superman movie!" Not realizing that they were, in fact, different characters? Yeah, grim and gritty worked so well for Superman last time. On the other hand, it would be nice to have someone who actually thinks about plots and characters and rising action in charge. And if anyone can find a good actor to play Superman, it's the guy who saw Heath Ledger and thought "Joker!"
Maybe this time Superman can actually say he fights for truth, justice, and the American Way instead of cutting off that last part. Yeah, if you're too cynical to have Superman fighting for the American Way, you probably shouldn't be writing a Superman movie. Also, if you're homophobic, you might not want to get involved in that Liberace biopic. Sincerely, Captain Obvious.
