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Video games will rot your brains
Oct. 16th, 2008 12:34 pmAs a big fan of the Prince of Persia, and not-so-big a fan of jumping puzzles in first-person shooters, the idea of a first-person platformer sounded like it had an ass made of fail... but damn if Mirror's Edge doesn't look like they've pulled it off. Apparently, you can play the entire game without killing anyone, just using disarms to disable opponents. You know, for all you pinko commie long-hairs. And look, colors other than brown!
Aside from the misstep of Warrior Within, I've loved the Prince of Persia games (and really hoping they don't fuck up the movie. Gyllenhaal, you better know Parkour. And take some "being Persian" lessons while you're at it. OH WAIT, YOU CAN'T, CUZ YOU'RE WHITE). Fortunately, Ubisoft seems to have learned their lesson from a game scored with Godsmack and I Stand Alone. Just listen to the music
This is the game I imagine Doctor Who plays when he's not saving the universe. This is a new Prince (as the old one has wrapped up his adventuring) and it looks like they're keeping my favorite aspects of Sands of Time and Two Thrones, which was his buddy-movie sexual tension with Farah. OTP! Go Team Prince!
Okay, the music makes me think Spider-Man should be staring into my soul and I really hope the voice actor for Spidey is just a placeholder (generic angst /= quips. What was wrong with Rino Romano?), but I'm already shipping symbiote-Spidey with symbiote-Black Cat. It ain't cheating if you're infected with an alien lifeform, MJ.
And how much do I love the opening shot of Spider-Man going from "Damn it all, it's hopeless!" to "Time to save some lives anyway" in SECONDS? THAT'S Spider-Man.
In fact, a symbiote invasion would have made for a great Spider-Man movie. Since Harry's already done the "I know your secret, Peter, and I'm striking at the ones you love!"... imagine Venom's just the one who has it in personal for Spidey. Spider-Man barely manages to beat them, then we find out his symbiote was just the first of many. Cue Carnage, a Spider-Man/Venom team-up, a symbioted Mary-Jane... there's your fourth movie right there (assuming movie three had just been Sandman and Harry). Plus, imagine panning up from Peter and Mary-Jane's reuniting kiss to find a romantic meteor shower... which all turn out to carry EVIL SYMBIOTES! And in the church tower, Eddie gets symbioted! Everyone who watched Spider-Man 3 would be foaming at the mouth for Spider-Man 4.
Aside from the misstep of Warrior Within, I've loved the Prince of Persia games (and really hoping they don't fuck up the movie. Gyllenhaal, you better know Parkour. And take some "being Persian" lessons while you're at it. OH WAIT, YOU CAN'T, CUZ YOU'RE WHITE). Fortunately, Ubisoft seems to have learned their lesson from a game scored with Godsmack and I Stand Alone. Just listen to the music
This is the game I imagine Doctor Who plays when he's not saving the universe. This is a new Prince (as the old one has wrapped up his adventuring) and it looks like they're keeping my favorite aspects of Sands of Time and Two Thrones, which was his buddy-movie sexual tension with Farah. OTP! Go Team Prince!
Okay, the music makes me think Spider-Man should be staring into my soul and I really hope the voice actor for Spidey is just a placeholder (generic angst /= quips. What was wrong with Rino Romano?), but I'm already shipping symbiote-Spidey with symbiote-Black Cat. It ain't cheating if you're infected with an alien lifeform, MJ.
And how much do I love the opening shot of Spider-Man going from "Damn it all, it's hopeless!" to "Time to save some lives anyway" in SECONDS? THAT'S Spider-Man.
In fact, a symbiote invasion would have made for a great Spider-Man movie. Since Harry's already done the "I know your secret, Peter, and I'm striking at the ones you love!"... imagine Venom's just the one who has it in personal for Spidey. Spider-Man barely manages to beat them, then we find out his symbiote was just the first of many. Cue Carnage, a Spider-Man/Venom team-up, a symbioted Mary-Jane... there's your fourth movie right there (assuming movie three had just been Sandman and Harry). Plus, imagine panning up from Peter and Mary-Jane's reuniting kiss to find a romantic meteor shower... which all turn out to carry EVIL SYMBIOTES! And in the church tower, Eddie gets symbioted! Everyone who watched Spider-Man 3 would be foaming at the mouth for Spider-Man 4.
