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seriousfic ([personal profile] seriousfic) wrote2010-08-08 08:20 pm

Rizzoli & Isles fic: Lazy Sunday (R/I)

Title: Lazy Sunday
Fandom: Rizzoli & Isles
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 966
Characters/Pairings: Rizzoli/Isles
Summary: Rizzoli and Isles decide to sleep in on their day off. That's it. That's the whole plot.



The alarm radio rang and Rizzoli jerked up, waking Isles, who could've slept through 'Ride of the Valkyries' if it weren't for being wrapped around Rizzoli. After a moment of disorientation, Rizzoli folded Isles back under her arm and laid down. She turned the radio off with one satisfyingly crocked finger. "Go back to sleep, Maura, it's our day off."

Isles turned her pillow over and smothered herself in it. "Then why'd you set the alarm?"

"Because the absolute best feeling in the world is waking up and realizing you don't have to get out of bed."

Isles turned her head so she could see Rizzoli's smile. It was kind of like making a discovery, getting a test in positive after too many negatives. She let her fingers stroke the underside of Rizzoli's throat, which among certain populations of the Sudan showed Sapphic interest by emphasizing the lack of facial hair.

"The absolute best?"

"You're the unspoken exception. Like when I talk about Davonni's chocolate cake and say it's the best thing I've ever tasted…"

"When really it's that crumb cake I made you for your birthday?"

"Yes, what else could it be?" Rizzoli let it go to wrestle Isles under her, using that adorable beer belly that came from sitting in a lab all day as pillow.

"You know, there are certain big cats that use sleeping positions to assert their dominance over the pride."

Rizzoli looped her arm around the smooth, toned length of Isles' leg. She was so good about jogging. "I'm a tiger, baby. Grr," Rizzoli deadpanned.

"What do you plan to do in your capacity of pride leader?" As always, it was hard to tell if Isles was being deadpan or not.

"We stay in bed all day. Morning, we enjoy this Posturepedic mattress you thought would make a good Christmas present. Afternoon, we play Bad Cop, Willing Suspect. And in the evening, we order pizza and watch True Blood."

"We really should have a healthy meal earlier in the day, and exercise to balance out the low nutritional value of Italian pizza."

"As opposed to Chinese pizza?" Rizzoli patted Isles' firm thigh. "Fine, as part of the deal you'll cut, perp, you can bring me salad in bed. And then I'll give you all the exercise you can handle."

Isles' caressing of Rizzoli's hair showed she liked the idea. "Your hair is very glossy. You must eat a lot of B vitamins."

"I try." Rizzoli worked her way between Isles' legs, enjoying the way the weight fell on her. "Tell me more about how pretty I am. I'm a girl. I can take it."

It was then the phone decided to ring. A gunshot would've broken Rizzoli's equilibrium less.

"Get that for me, would you, beta?"

Isles wiggled over to the bedstand, kicking when Rizzoli stayed latched on to her lower body. Finally, she managed to snag the phone and pass it to her girlfriend.

"Hello?" Rizzoli answered.

"Jane, it's your mother. Did you hear that Ellen and her lady friend are adopting a baby? I just saw it on Fox News."

"Yes, mother, it's in the lesbian newsletter. Could you talk to me later, I have a big case. Lots of casework. Bye mom." She hung up.

"You don't feel the slightest bit guilty about that?" Isles asked.

Rizzoli nuzzled against her. "You do have a mother, right Maura?"

The phone rang again. "That's mine," Isles said.

"Who else would have James Tenney for their ringtone?"

"The glissando produces tones that are each a golden ratio below the prior."

"We speak English in this house."

Isles answered. "Hello? Mrs. Rizzoli, hello. Yes, I did hear that Ms. DeGeneres is adopting."

Rizzoli grabbed the phone from her. "Mom, why are you calling Maura?"

"I can't talk to my stepdaughter?"

"She's not your stepdaughter! We're not getting married!"

"You know, just because you're not interested in men, doesn't mean children are out of the picture. There's not only adoption, there's artificial insemination."

"Not a single part of that sentence logically follows from anything I've said. Ever."

"I'm just saying, I carried you in my womb for nine months, but it's fine if you don't want to carry a little bundle of granddaughter. But the least you could do is adopt. Do you know how bad the foster care system is? It's on Sixty Minutes. And meanwhile, you and Maura have such an empty home…"

"No we don't! We don't live together!"

"Of course not, it'd be living in sin. But we live in Massachusetts! It's the state that's daring you to have a gay wedding. And you'd look so darling in a white gown…"

"Ma, I have to go back to work. The FBI is here, they want to know if we have any leads on Al-Qaeda."

"Al-Qaeda? Should I drive to your aunt's house? It's in Brookline."

"Yes. You should go there right now. But don't use your cell phone, it might be booby-trapped."

Isles snatched the phone away from her. "Mrs. Rizzoli, we haven't found any evidence of boobies. It's safe to stay in your home."

Rizzoli put Isles in a bear hug, getting the phone close to her mouth. "Ma, who are you gonna believe, me or Maura?"

"…Jane, I'd better stay in. You know True Blood is on tonight."

"Okay, Ma, fine. Call you later." She hung up. "I'm not calling her later." Rizzoli dropped down to the bed for a moment before jerking back up. "I'm taking a shower."

Isles laid around, until she heard the shower running. The bed, orthopedically correct or not, just wasn't as comfortable without Rizzoli in it. So she got up to join her in the shower. It wouldn't be as comfortable, but it would be a damn sight more interesting.

[identity profile] ttandme69.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 02:24 am (UTC)(link)
lol....love the mom....Lorraine Baracco is great as the mama in this role!!! Loving the fic...please post more. thanks, Lisa

[identity profile] pandora-007.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 02:35 am (UTC)(link)
that was freaking cute.. loved it.. mama Rizzoli is just impossible but in a very nice way..

[identity profile] laughsunshine.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
Hahaha, very lovely!
& LOL at your icon.

[identity profile] kayryn.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
I LOLed my way through this. SO FUNNY! Brilliant job.
(deleted comment)
rainne: (Rizzoli & Isles - Maura - LOL Gif)

[personal profile] rainne 2010-08-09 10:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Ditto again. There was absolutely no part of this story that wasn't funny.

[identity profile] thefutilitarian.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 06:45 am (UTC)(link)
That was awesome.
Particularly the Alpha/Beta thing.
As it's nice to know the rest of the world plays that game, too. LOL

"Ma, I have to go back to work. The FBI is here, they want to know if we have any leads on Al-Qaeda."

"Al-Qaeda? Should I drive to your aunt's house? It's in Brookline."

"Yes. You should go there right now. But don't use your cell phone, it might be booby-trapped."

...was utterly fantastic! I love Jane's Mum.

[identity profile] xbirdseyeviewx.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 08:03 am (UTC)(link)
LOVE.

[identity profile] storm-8.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 09:42 am (UTC)(link)
Hehe, hilarious! Gotta love Angela Rizzoli and her not so subtle hints for Jane to move in with Maura, get married, adopt a baby... ;)
Loved the fic!

[identity profile] ceridwyn2.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 11:12 am (UTC)(link)
Oh gods this had me laughing out loud - poor cat thinks I've gone nuts. Probably have.

I love Rizzoli's Mom. Seriously, Lorraine Bracco rocks it.
ext_425300: (Default)

[identity profile] mayireadtoday.livejournal.com 2010-08-09 03:35 pm (UTC)(link)
I love how you have Maura's random facts of awesomeness.

Hilarios: "But we live in Massachusetts! It's the state that's daring you to have a gay wedding. And you'd look so darling in a white gown…"

[identity profile] winstonta.livejournal.com 2010-08-10 03:13 am (UTC)(link)
I love that I was able to hear Angie Harmon in my head when I read this. It's really quite a talent you've got there, and I must thank you for putting that deep sexy voice in my brain.

You wrote these two fantastically, as well as Jane's mother (who I of course care for so much more on the tv series than in the book series). Keep up the great work, and I hope to see more Rizzoli & Isles fic from you :)

[identity profile] dreamshadower.livejournal.com 2010-08-10 02:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Pfffft, that was so funny. I can see my own Mom doing that stunt.

I'm sure when they play Bad Cop, Willing Suspect Jane will find those boobies. ;)

[identity profile] luna-dove.livejournal.com 2010-08-10 04:59 pm (UTC)(link)
You need to write more fics with Mamma Rizzoli in them, because you write her character so well. Great fic!

[identity profile] fallon-ash.livejournal.com 2010-08-11 06:27 pm (UTC)(link)
*stupid happy grin*

Hilarious and perfect! Characterization and interaction and dialogue and yay! Thank you!

[identity profile] wildwildwood.livejournal.com 2010-08-13 10:08 am (UTC)(link)
"Of course not, it'd be living in sin. But we live in Massachusetts!"

I love Mamma Rizzoli!
whedonist: (Default)

[personal profile] whedonist 2010-08-15 05:52 am (UTC)(link)
Sunday morning's really are awesome and the story was as well. Thank you for sharing.

[identity profile] 7tree-hugger.livejournal.com 2010-08-15 06:07 pm (UTC)(link)
This was great! Hysterical! You write the best dialogue, seriously.

[identity profile] ggdogsdottir.livejournal.com 2010-10-01 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
This is so well done. .. my favorite line:

"We stay in bed all day. Morning, we enjoy this Posturepedic mattress you thought would make a good Christmas present. Afternoon, we play Bad Cop, Willing Suspect. And in the evening, we order pizza and watch True Blood."

That sounds like a perfect Sunday. :)

[identity profile] dariclone.livejournal.com 2011-02-12 01:54 am (UTC)(link)
Lol, love that Angela interuppted Jane and Maura just to tell them that Ellen and Portia are adopting! And I love Jane's brush-off about Al Quada too. Nice fic. :)

[identity profile] ianthine9.livejournal.com 2011-11-04 08:45 am (UTC)(link)
Can I just say this is the best thing to show up on a google of "rizzoli and isles fanfic"? It's awesomely in character, light, sweet, fluffy and...awesome.