seriousfic (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
seriousfic) wrote2011-12-08 10:02 pm
seriousfic) wrote2011-12-08 10:02 pm
Burlesque
My sister rented Burlesque. That should put all suspicion that she's really a man to rest.
-In case you were wondering, burlesque dancing is basically stripping, but for gay men. I'm not being homophobic--it's literally strip routines with elaborate costumes, musical numbers, and no nipples. It's either for gay men or glee club members who've been chemically castrated.
-Cam Gigandet wears a vest, guyliner, and a bowler hat. In terms of straight male costuming, that's 70% more fantastical than your average Star Trek alien.
-I know it sounds snooty to say you could write a better movie (although I really could write a better ending to Immortals), but give me one draft and I could make a better movie. Kirsten Bell stars in this movie. Page 1 rewrite: VERONICA MARS IS A STRIPPER: THE MOVIE. Stanley Tucci can stay.
-I think Cher in this movie was an early make-up test for Hugo Weaving in Captain America: The First Avenger.
-In case you were wondering, burlesque dancing is basically stripping, but for gay men. I'm not being homophobic--it's literally strip routines with elaborate costumes, musical numbers, and no nipples. It's either for gay men or glee club members who've been chemically castrated.
-Cam Gigandet wears a vest, guyliner, and a bowler hat. In terms of straight male costuming, that's 70% more fantastical than your average Star Trek alien.
-I know it sounds snooty to say you could write a better movie (although I really could write a better ending to Immortals), but give me one draft and I could make a better movie. Kirsten Bell stars in this movie. Page 1 rewrite: VERONICA MARS IS A STRIPPER: THE MOVIE. Stanley Tucci can stay.
-I think Cher in this movie was an early make-up test for Hugo Weaving in Captain America: The First Avenger.
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